Things that are (not) Goblins

Inspired by DiY and Dragons, I have been working up a big goblin compilation post.  In the process, I started thinking about goblins in media.  And the internet is good for lists, so here it is:

• Labyrinth – The Frouds have designed the platonic form of goblins.  Except that goblins are by their nature the rejection of such forms.
• Hobbits are not goblins.  Gnomes are probably goblins.
• The Wizard of Oz – Almost everything in Oz uses goblin logic.  It’s a goblin civilization filled with many non-goblins.
• Oompa-Loompas – Racist goblins.  In the movies they’re more quirky dwarves (too competent to be goblins).  In Kiel Chenier's version they’re goblins.
• Gremlins – If these aren’t goblins, then goblins are just weak orcs.  They are definitely goblins.  Check out the Institute of Gremlins 2 Studies for deep thoughts on the meaning of goblins.
• Muppets – Muppet monsters are goblins.  Most of the unnamed Muppet Show performers are goblins.
• World of Warcraft goblins – Some of the best goblins, although a bit one note.  I believe you can play through the goblin starter zone for free to get the feel for them.
• Goblin Slayer – Edgelord goblins.  Goblins are most interesting when there is tension between whimsy and sociopathy.
• Warhammer 40k – Gretchins are kobolds, not goblins (kobolds are marked by sniveling and working).  The football hooligan orcs (c.f. the Dawn of War game) are basically beefy goblins.
• Skaven – Evil, ratty goblins.
• Kakamora (coconut monsters) from Moana – Excellent goblins, riding a fabulous goblin ship.
• The Princess and the Goblin/The Princess and Curdie – Yes, goblins.
• Tolkien - Weak orcs.
• Rankin-Bass Tolkien - Gobliny orcs.
• Peter Jackson's Tolkien - That's definitely a goblin king.
• BoxTrolls – Every character in this movie is a goblin except for the boy and the generic townsfolk.
• Podlings – Not goblins.  Lack sarcasm and irony. They’re better halflings.
• Ewoks – Same.  Actually, if you played up the human-eating bits, they might be goblins.
• Smurfs – Not goblins, too rationalized.  May have been goblins at one point, before excessive drug use and utopian experiments.
• Trolls (Justin Timberlake movie) – Unredeemed Bergens are goblins.
• Dr. Seuss – Seuss’s furry creatures are not really goblins, but the machines are absolutely goblin tech.

I am happy to throw down on any of these points, or accept further suggestions.

Some observations from this list:  Goblins are small and many.  Goblins are generally destructive.  Goblins employ goblin logic.  In the next post, I’ll survey goblins in the RPG space.